Hilariously bad Christmas album covers

Country star Kenny was realistic about his Christmas expectations back in 2003.

John Barrowman is a good-looking guy but there's something slightly terrifying about the lighting here. The jazz hands and the tree might be welcoming, but the pained grimace on John's face seems to be warning us away.

The airbrushing on this is so heavy that David Hasslehoff almost looks a bit like Cher; but at least he's taken the time to sign the cover.

This is not The One That We Want.

Mariah is, naturally, the Queen of Christmas so it's only right this is extra-festive, but… what's going on with the snowman? And that snowdrift in front of Mimi – she must be freezing!

The Crazy Frog era of 2005–2006 was quite a trip. At least he's covering himself up with a snowball, for a change.

An album of Star Wars-themed Christmas songs, featuring none other than Jon Bon Jovi. Amazing! But who is the man at the fireside? A hatless Santa? Obi-Wan Kenobi? We'll never know.

Yeah, this happened.

New Kids on the Block's 1989 Christmas album. Donnie appears to be strangling young Joey and Danny's right foot is more prominent than any band member's actual face.

We're confused. Why does Ringo wanna be Santa Claus when he's as green as the Grinch?

We need to talk about the hair. The sprigs of holly around the border are… very festive, and almost as bad as the hair.

In 1999, this was funny. Yes, it's an animated turd. What can I say? It's before everyone got broadband – they were simpler times.

Cee Lo Green's 2012 Christmas album cover redefined 'A LOT'.

Strong Mariah energy from Gaga here, which is a good start, but the scribbly typeface is a little distracting.

Not to say Rod has a history of preferring blondes, but even his Christmas tree has gone full peroxide.

Okay, so it was a single, but this is a truly timeless piece of art from the Fast Food Rockers. Those purple and tinfoil bootcut slacks are the business. The music video is also quite something(!).

Despite its lacklustre cover, 98° sold over a million copies of this album in America.

We're not quite sure about your deconstructed Santa approach, Herb.

Well, they're not called The Shy Girls are they?

A 2006 special single from Ricky Tomlinson, with a cover that you can never unsee.

Who wouldn't want to spend the whole of Christmas at the organ?

Not so much KFC as JFC, the chicken-loving colonel put together a finger-licking good selection of his favourute Christmas songs – but perhaps had one snowball too many and lapsed into unconsciousness for the artwork shoot.

Careful what you wish for, kid. Not sure *whose* front teeth he's ended up with, tbh.

If the cover isn't grabbing you, the first track on this 2003 album by rapper Indo G is called Frosty the Blowman. No, not a typo.

What do you think Jim's favourite colour might be?

Fun fact: Jimmy Buffett was born on Christmas Day.

I think this woman was hoping for a bigger tree.

Understated and timeless are just two words you could never describe this (borderline unreadable) album cover from king of bling Liberace.

Has Swedish entertainer Thore Skogmans got a sausage in his hands or is he just pleased to see us? Oh, no, as you were, it's a sausage.

American Idol contestant William perhaps got a little carried away in Microsoft Paint.

Sorry Kammy but we think those are sprigs of rosemary, not branches of a fir tree.

We count at least three different fonts here, a whole lot of filter, and a turkey that does not look fit for consumption.